The Art of Defending Racism
Doing something racist is easy- you don’t even have to think about it. But keeping racism alive? That takes work! Luckily for you, racism is deeply entrenched in our society, so all you need to do is hold the gates against those who would try to dislodge it, and let them wear themselves out. You'll want to use the tactics listed below to protect your own racist behavior, as well as those of others- after all- racism works because we work together!
Winning the war against equality!
No matter what, your objective is to be able to maintain these three beliefs at the end of any exchange:
1) I’m not racist.
2) I didn’t do anything wrong.
3) I don’t have to change at all.
If you can hold on to that, then you win!
How it works
Like a drinking problem or drug habit, racism works best when no one is willing to talk about it, and even better, when everyone works together to cover up the problem. The most important thing is to make sure that you can hide your problem from yourself- it’s key in maintaining those 3 beliefs that will keep you racist for a lifetime!
Saying or doing something racist will come naturally to you- but defending it? You’ll want to use one of the following tactics. They’re listed from the more soft handed and defensive tactics to the most aggressive, giving you a full range of options! Don’t worry, whether you’re liberal, conservative, in the closet racist, or tatooed and ready for Rahowa, there’s something here for you!
A. It’s not that serious
1. We didn’t know better (and we never will)
2. You’re too sensitive
3. It’s not a big deal because it’s just (a movie, a song, a book, words, etc.)
4. Why should we care? (You don't matter anyway)
5. We didn’t mean any harm (But we'll do it again)
6. I was drunk on klanschlager/high on nazi-X/taking Xanax
1. POC do XYZ to themselves (so it’s ok that we also do XYZ)
2. I’m oppressed too!
3. Hey! Look at sexism/classicism/Global Warming! Diversion
4. One POC says it’s cool
5. POC can discriminate too!
6. What about reverse racism?
7. We’re not discriminating AS MUCH (as other people/as we used to), isn’t that good?!? Give me a cookie.
8. My best friend/spouse/adopted child/my ancestor 5 generations back is POC
9. I’ve done XYZ, which proves I’m not racist, and I get a free pass for anything else I do.
1. You’re oppressing me by making me be “PC”
2. You’re too stupid to be in this conversation and everything you say doesn’t matter
3. Racism is over now
4. If we don’t talk about it, it’ll magically go away
5. Under my definition- it’s not racist
6. You’re too angry/You’re being irrational
7. Racism has always existed, we can’t fix it, you should stop complaining.
1. Be glad it isn’t worse, we could be doing XYZ/I’ll give you a reason to cry
2. You brought this on yourself/ If you people didn’t... XYZ
3. Go back to where you came from!
The Russian Retreat (Be like Water)
Naturally, anyone who attempts to call you on a racist behavior, will probably try to also refute your defense. Fortunately for you, when your defense isn’t based on actual reasons, but simply irrationality, you can switch tactics on the drop of a dime without any explaination. Simply switch from one defense to another, randomly, and let your opponent continue to wear themselves out trying to penetrate your happy wall of racist belief!
For additional fun, you can switch to a tactic you’ve used previously. Half of them will not even notice they’ve been led in a circle, the other half will lose all hope and give up! Hurrah for ignorance!
The Wall of Whiteness
As the Greeks knew, the key to a good defense was teamwork. If you have more than one person supporting racism involved in the conversation, then all of you should use different tactics simultaneously- your opponent will have to fight on multiple fronts, and have to keep switching his or her train of thought to meet each defense. They’ll wear out in no time, and, you can reinforce and protect each other’s 3 beliefs.
Judas is your friend (when you’re Roman)
You may be fortunate enough to have rallied POC allies in racism. Their 3 beliefs replace “I” with “My white friends”, and they’re just as willing to defend you as another white person. These allies are pure gold. They lend credibility to your defense that you’re not racist, and what you’ve done isn’t racist. Instead of simply wearing out your opponents, these allies will completely demoralize them and wound them to the heart, opening them easily for the kill.
The Theory of it all
The best part of irrational behavior, is that you don't need to understand a lick of it. But some of you may wish to further your studies on the path of racism, so it's best to be armed with the theory behind the tactics. Luckily, in our modern era, the information is but a few keystrokes away:
Wikipedia on Denial
Denial is a defense mechanism in which a person is faced with a fact that is too painful to accept and rejects it instead, insisting that it is not true despite what may be overwhelming evidence. The subject may deny the reality of the unpleasant fact altogether (simple denial), admit the fact but deny its seriousness (minimisation) or admit both the fact and seriousness but deny responsibility (transference).
Denial of responsibility:
This form of denial involves avoiding personal responsibility by blaming, minimizing or justifying. Blaming is a direct statement shifting culpability and may overlap with denial of fact. Minimizing is an attempt to make the effects or results of an action appear to be less harmful than they may actually be. Justifying is when someone takes a choice and attempts to make that choice look okay due to their perception of what is "right" in a situation. Someone using denial of responsibility is usually attempting to avoid potential harm or pain by shifting attention away from themselves.
Denial of impact:
Denial of impact involves a person avoiding thinking about or understanding the harms their behavior have caused to themselves or others. By doing this, that person is able to avoid feeling a sense of guilt and it can prevent that person from developing remorse or empathy for others. Denial of impact reduces or eliminates a sense of pain or harm from poor decisions.
Denial of awareness:
This type of denial is best discussed by looking at the concept of state dependent learning. People using this type of denial will avoid pain and harm by stating they were in a different state of awareness (such as alcohol or drug intoxication or on occasion mental health related). This type of denial often overlaps with denial of responsibility.
Denial of cycle:
Many who use this type of denial will say things such as, "it just happened." Denial of cycle is where a person avoids looking at their decisions leading up to an event or does not consider their pattern of decision making and how harmful behavior is repeated. The pain and harm being avoided by this type of denial is more of the effort needed to change the focus from a singular event to looking at preceding events. It can also serve as a way to blame or justify behavior (see above).
Denial of denial:
This can be a difficult concept for many people to identify in themselves, but is a major barrier to changing hurtful behaviors. Denial of denial involves thoughts, actions and behaviors which bolster confidence that nothing needs to be changed in ones personal behavior. This form of denial typically overlaps with all of the other forms of denial, but involves more self-delusion.
Remember, ignorance doesn't just maintain itself! Only with your hard work and diligent efforts can we keep hate alive!